This is not your typical milf dating story. In fact, it’s not even about formal dating at all. Usually, when people talk about milf dating or any other kind of adult dating, it’s all about meeting somebody online or through some sort of online dating app or site like milffinder.us. You know exactly what I’m talking about. You probably used Tinder. You know how easy it is to hook up with pussy on Tinder.
As long as you can avoid all those fake profiles or robots, you can get real pussy. I’m not talking about some standard pussy, I’m not talking about desperate women, and I’m definitely not talking about crazy chicks who are looking for any kind of dick. We’re talking about quality, primo pussy. That’s what people usually mean when they talk about dating.
This is not really a typical milf dating story, although it does involve a mom I’d love to fuck. And as you read this story, you can see why that’s the case.
My buddy Ryan and I have known each other for about 20 years. We went to boy scouts together, we camped out a lot, we went on many road trips. In fact, I was lucky enough to be around when Ryan lost his virginity to some Mexican hooker in Tijuana. Yeah, we go that far back. We’ve gone through ups and downs, crazy girlfriends, hard breakups, that kind of thing.
Ryan is a smart kid. I mean, he’s one smart cookie and he got admitted to Stanford University. Never in my wildest dreams would I ever think that I would get admitted into Stanford so I didn’t even bother applying. He did.
The funny thing about Ryan was that when he got in, he was actually pretty sad. I know that’s hard to believe because getting into Stanford University is like winning the lottery. The reason why he’s sad was because he got rejected to Yale, Harvard and Princeton. He wanted to be a Wall Street attorney and he saw Yale, Harvard or some sort of Ivy League degree as getting him one step closer to getting into a prestigious law school so he can join a Wall Street firm.
Ryan, if anything, is a guy who believes in planning. When I told you about him losing his virginity, that took place according to plan. Nothing isn’t planned with Ryan. And that’s why it really struck me when he called me in the middle of a class at the community college I was going to.
He told me he was visiting town and he wanted to hang out. So I told him, “Cool, man. Let’s do that. I’ll bring the beer.” He said he wants to meet at his place. So I show up at his place and there was his mom.
I’ve never really been particularly attracted to Mrs. Steinberg. She had these thick lips and kind of droopy eyes, and this kind of like brillo pad hairdo that seems like a relic from the 1970’s or 1960’s. I really couldn’t quite put my finger on it, but anyway, she was there and she was wearing typical mom jeans and doing the typical mom shit, and Ryan was just basically, without showing it, rolling his eyes every time his mom talked. Believe me, I know exactly where he’s coming from.
So we hung out at the upper veranda of their mansion up on the hills in my town and Ryan, all of a sudden, whipped out some pot. I was shocked, man, because this dude is all about planning. This guy is Mr. Ambition. He’s the guy who is in a hurry to go places in life and I’m the quintessential, all-American slacker. So anyway, apparently this was the first time Ryan is going to smoke weed and he wants to smoke it with his best buddy.
I am not a newbie to weed. In fact, I’m a veteran to the ways of marijuana. So I showed him how to load a bong and fired it up. Sure enough, after one hit, Ryan was out like a fucking light. I would have laughed out loud. It was that funny, but it was, in a way, kind of sad. So I was really, really stoned and I was just like exploring their house.
I decided to go down the stairs to the kitchen to take care of my munchies. I was fucking ready to eat a whole fucking cow, man. I was that fucking starved. So I see Mrs. Steinberg, or Lenny, bending over. I guess she was cleaning the fridge.
I did not know what the fuck the came over me and I grabbed her by the crotch. I grabbed her basically by the ass and I just shoved my middle finger in between the crack. What was really shocking, if that wasn’t shocking enough, was that she backed up against my finger and she looked at me with a totally different look in her eyes.
One thing led to another and she had those thick droopy lips wrapped tightly around my cock. I mean, the harder she sucked, the harder my cock got and I thought I was going to explode in her mouth. I felt like a volcano.
I just grabbed her by the hair, pulled her up and I grabbed her by the butt and straddled her and were fucking basically standing up. And she was just screaming like it was nobody’s business. Thank goodness Ryan was just fucking out. I mean, he looked like he got hit hard by Manny Pacquiao, man. He was just fucking flat.
I must have fucking ejaculated about 20 times inside his mom and to this day, I have kept this a secret from my buddy who’s now a US attorney, representing the government in international litigation. I still visit his place from time to time and when I come across his mom, she and I would exchange knowing smiles, but that’s pretty much the end of that.
